Adult Autism Resources by Autistic Adults

Adults on the spectrum can have a diverse experience when engaging with the social world. Commonalities that adults on the spectrum have experienced include….

• Camouflaging – Social camouflaging refers to strategies used to blend into social surroundings or present one’s personality as different in order to be perceived as neurotypical.
• Masking – This is a strategy of camouflaging that is used to hide autistic characteristics or portray a non-autistic persona. Examples: adjusting face and body to appear confident and/or relaxed, forcing eye contact, ect.
• Social Interactions –  Performing well in social situations but missing nuances and subtleties.
• Stimming – Suppressing stims and self-regulatory behavior, or more subtle stims like hair twirling, fingerpicking, etc. 
• Anxiety around social situations
• Burnout and Meltdowns 
• Other diagnoses that don’t “feel right” to the individual

If you are an adult on the spectrum who experiences these challenges, or think you might be on the spectrum because you deal with these challenges, these resources may be for you!

Unmasking Autism: Discovering the New Face of Neurodiversity by Dr. Devon Price (2022)

Dr. Devon Price is an Autistic Adult who was diagnosed later in life. In their book “Unmasking Autism” they write about the concept of “masked autistics”- adults who have blended in with neurotypical society and have not been diagnosed. The book centers on Dr. Price’s journey of learning how to “unmask.” Studies have shown (Hull et al., 2017) that masking for prolonged periods of time leads to burnout, meltdowns, anxiety, and depression. In this book, they uncover more data on how they learned to understand their autistic self. 

Key Concepts:

• Their personal journey of diagnosis and growing up
• Learning how to accept your Autistic self
• Networking and Connecting with other Autistic Adults
• Creating a Neurodiverse Affirming world

Women on the Spectrum: A Handbook for Life by Dr. Emma Goodall and Yenn Purkis (2020)

Both Dr. Goodall and Yenn Purkis are Autistic, and they wrote this book as a “handbook” for autistic women and girls throughout their lifespan. This book focuses on women and girls, highlighting each stage of life and the unique difference in autism for people socialized as women. This book is good for all people and not just women and girls, but it does shed light on the unique differences of those who have been raised as women in society. The book follows a fun, easy to read Question and Answer style, making it a quick read or a good guide. 

Key Concepts:

• Understanding what Autism can look like for the reader
• How Autism affects stages of life 
• Practical life skills, dating life skills, and parenting skills for Autistic people
• Tips and tricks for all Autistic people, but primarily geared toward women

Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum by Jennifer Cook O’Toole (2018)

Jennifer Cook O’Toole is a well-known author who has written many books, including Asperkids (2012). She was diagnosed with autism later in life after all 3 of her children were diagnosed. Autism in Heels (2018) is the story of her life, looking back on it after her diagnosis and highlighting her own strengths and areas of growth. She was recently featured on the show “Love on the Spectrum U.S.,” where she taught social and dating skills to other individuals on the spectrum. 

Key Concepts:

• Jennifer Cook O’Toole’s own story and experiences as an Autistic woman.
• Themes of Camouflaging, Social Struggles, and Executive Dysfunction

Sincerely, Your Autistic Child by Emily Paige Ballou, Sharon daVanport, and Morénike Giwa Onaiwu (2021)

This book is a combination of letters and poems written by many Autistic authors complied together by the Autistic Women and Non-Binary Network (AWN). The authors Emily Paige Ballou, Sharon daVanport, and Morénike Giwa Onaiwu are all a part of this non-profit. This book is geared toward parents, caregivers, and other adults who care for children with autism, but it is unique because it is written by adults with autism writing to their parents or child selves. This book can be enjoyed and is a good resource for other adults with autism. 

Key Concepts:

• What Autistic adults wish their parents knew while growing up
• Understanding acceptance, identity, and friendship
• Looking at the overlap of sexuality and gender identity

But You Don’t Look Autistic at All by Bianca Toeps (2020)

Bianca Toeps is a web developer, photographer, and blogger who writes about her experiences as an Autistic woman. In her book, she writes about what she wishes other people knew about her and about autism. This book is a great resource for those who are autistic; it is also highly recommended to neurotypical parents, partners, and peers of autistic people. Bianca highlights her unique experience navigating life as a woman on the spectrum and a woman in tech and how she is often perceived by neurotypical peers.  

Key Concepts:

• Her own life and stories from others
• Tips for non-autistic people about talking to and about autistic adults

Thinking In Pictures by Dr. Temple Grandin (1995)

Temple Grandin is a professor, author, and animal scientist who was diagnosed with autism at a young age. She has written many books about autism and revolutionized the way the world saw autism. In this book, she writes about how her brain works and sees images. She writes about how all people’s brains work differently. She is a big advocate for children on the spectrum to follow their special interests and turn them into careers. There is even a children’s book version of this book, The Girl Who Thought in Pictures (2017)

Key Concepts:

• Highlighting the unique and different ways people think in their own brains. i.e., some in pictures, words, 3-D, many more, and multiple!
• Talking about her own experiences being on the autism spectrum and working with autistic youth. 

The Journal of Best Practices by David Finch (2012)

David Finch was diagnosed with Autism (previously Asperger’s syndrome) after marrying his wife. In this book, he writes about marriage and relationships for autistic people while highlighting what he picked up while learning more about autism. He writes about his experience being in a relationship and a marriage with his neurotypical wife, who thinks and processes the world differently than he does. 

Key Concepts:

• Marriage and relationships for people on the spectrum
• His own recommendations and messages about what helps in his marriage

More Books on Autism:

• • Autistics on Autism: Stories You Need to Hear About What Helped Them While Growing Up and Pursuing Their Dreams by Kerry Margo (2022)
  • Marriage and Lasting Relationships with Aspergers Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder) by Ava Mendes (2015)
  • Different Not Less by Chloe Hayden (2023) [Coming soon! Kindle Edition on August 30, 2022 and Paperback Edition on April 4, 2023]
  • Neurodiverse Relations by Joanna Pike and Tony Attwood (2019) [This book only focuses on heterosexual relationships]
  • Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Aspergers by John Elder Robinson (2008)

• For a more comprehensive list check out: https://notanautismmom.com/2020/07/20/autism-books/ 

References

Ballou E.P., daVanport S., & Onaiwu M.G. (2021) Sincerely your autistic child. Beacon Press.

Finch D. (2012) The journal of best practices. Scribner.

Grandin T. (1995) Thinking in pictures. Vintage.

Goodall E. & Purkis Y. (2020) Women on the spectrum: A handbook for life. Aapc Publishing.

Hayden C. (2022) Different not less. Murdoch Books.

Hull, L., Petrides, K. V., Allison, C., Smith, P., Baron-Cohen, S., Lai, M. C., & Mandy, W. (2017). “Putting on My Best Normal”: Social Camouflaging in Adults with Autism Spectrum Conditions. Journal of autism and developmental disorders, 47(8), 2519–2534. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-017-3166-5

Margo K. (2022) Autistics on autism: Stories you need to hear about what helped them while growing up and pursuing their dreams. Independently published.

Mendes A. (2015) Marriage and lasting relationships with Asperger’s Syndrome (autism spectrum disorder). Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

O’Toole, J. C. (2018) Autism in heels The untold story of a female life on the spectrum. Skyhorse.

Pike J. & Attwood T. (2019) Neurodiverse relationships. Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

Price D. (2022) Unmasking autism: discovering the new face of neurodiversity. Harmony.

Robinson, J. E. (2008) Look me in the eye: My life with Asperger’s. Three Rivers Press.

Toeps B. (2020) But you don’t look autistic at all. Toeps Media.