Adjustment to Life Changes

Introduction

Adjustment to life changes is an inevitable part of the human experience and can come with various challenges, making those moments both stressful and confusing regardless of age. With that being said, life changes can be challenging for everyone, but this blog will focus on how life changes and adjusting to life changes affect children. This blog will further expand on the types of adjustments that children may experience at some point, typical behaviors and other expectations during adjustment periods, the distinction between adjustment disorders and depression and anxiety, and ways that children can cope with life changes.

Types of Adjustments 

There are several types of adjustments that children may experience. A few are as follows:

• Starting school for the first time
• Moving, which can also involve changing schools and/or making new friends
• A new addition to the family or household, whether that be a sibling or pet
• Parental separation 
• Loss of a loved one
• Puberty 
• Health issues: These can be short- or long-term health issues, and they can also be ones that the child themselves is facing or a loved one is facing.

Typical Behaviors During Adjustments 

Life changes can come with various challenges. This, in turn, can affect how children (or anyone, in fact) behave when faced with life changes. According to the book Identifying and Supporting Children Through Life Changes (Nicolson, 2018), some behaviors that children may exhibit are as follows:

• Mood swings
• Changes in sleep patterns
• Toileting accidents
• Body aches (e.g., headaches, stomach aches)
• Trouble concentrating 
• Less sociable than usual
• Refusal to eat
• Thumb-sucking 
• Bullying
• Nightmares 
• Changes in temperament

Duration of Adjustment Periods  

As for the duration of adjustment periods, Nick Mankowitz, a clinical psychologist in Australia, states that “most of the time, people adjust to life changes within a few months” (n.d.). This may not be the most specific answer, but it makes sense knowing that everyone adjusts to life changes at different rates depending on the type of life change they’re going through and how much that life change impacts them. However, according to John Hopkins Medicine (2021), an emotional or behavioral reaction to a life change is considered “unhealthy” or an “excessive response” within three months of it happening. If this is the case, you or your child may have an adjustment disorder.

Adjustment v. Depression 

It’s common for adjustment disorders to be mistaken for depression due to similarities in symptoms. Some of the similarities include sadness, depressed mood, and feelings of hopelessness (Osborn, 2020). However, there are several important differences between adjustment disorders and depression to be aware of, one being duration. Adjustment disorders are said to last up to six months, provided the source of stress is identified and removed from  daily life. Depression, on the other hand, usually lasts longer than six months and can potentially be a lifelong mental illness for some individuals, especially if depressive symptoms are more severe. Another important difference between adjustment disorders and depression is the cause. With adjustment disorders, it is usually due to an identifiable life change, whereas with depression, the cause isn’t always due to a single identifiable cause and is thought to involve a mix of genetic and environmental factors. There are also slight differences with what interventions are used to treat both disorders. In treating adjustment disorders, the most common form of intervention is cognitive-behavioral therapy. Another form of intervention that is used less often is short-term use of medications. In treating depression, there are several interventions that can be used, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy, accepted and commitment therapy, mindfulness training, and medications. 

Adjustment v. Anxiety

Similarly to adjustment disorders and depression, it’s also common for adjustment disorders to be mistaken for anxiety due to similarities in symptoms. However, both mental health illnesses also have their differences. One of the main differences between adjustment disorder and anxiety is that adjustment disorders don’t lead to panic attacks, whereas anxiety often does. While adjustment disorders can last up to six months, anxiety can be acute or chronic depending on the type of anxiety that is being dealt with. Additionally, anxiety is typically due to genetics, psychological makeup, and/or environmental factors, rather than an identifiable life change. 

Ways to Cope with Adjustments 

So, how can you or a loved one cope with planned or spontaneous life changes in a safe and healthy manner? (New York Times, n.d.; University of Wisconsin-Madison, n.d.)

• Talk to your child about the change. This means going into what will happen or what has happened and what the change will mean for all involved. If you can talk about the change ahead of time, do so, as it can potentially help reduce your child’s worries and fears.

• Acknowledge your child’s worries and fears. This means validating their feelings (whether they’re feeling angry, sad, or confused) and recognizing that these feelings are normal and should be expressed.

• Try to keep other changes in your child’s life to a minimum during times of transition. The last thing you and your child need is more stress during an already stressful time.

• Do what you can to be available during times of transition and change. Support from loved ones can go a long way and can help your child feel more grounded and secure.

• Talk with your child’s teacher or child care provider about the changes going on. They won’t know unless you tell them yourselves, and they can potentially play a role in providing some sort of support.

• Model mindfulness techniques that have helped you in the past and see if they work for your child. It’s never too early to start navigating what techniques work best for your child.

• Present mindfulness as a tool that can be used in a variety of situations and not only during stressful times at a young age. This can help your child become more comfortable utilizing mindfulness techniques in different situations.

Conclusion

Life consists of both planned and spontaneous life changes, and we have to adjust to those changes regardless of age. Unfortunately, life doesn’t come with a handbook that provides step-by-step instructions on how to adjust to life changes of all types and levels of impact. With that being said, it’s important to be informed about the different types of adjustments that children may experience at some point and how they might react so that you can support your children in coping with life changes.

References 

Adjustment disorders. (2021). Johns Hopkins Medicine. https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/adjustment-disorders 

Differences between adjustment disorder, anxiety disorder, & depression. (2020). TELEMYND. https://mytime.telemynd.com/telemyndblog/adjustmentunderstandingthedisorder/ 

Hagerty, K. (2022). Adjustment disorder vs depression. HIMS. https://www.forhims.com/blog/adjustment-disorder-vs-depression 

Mankowitz, N. (n.d.). Life transitions and adjustment. http://www.noahmankowitz.com.au/services/life-transitions-adjustment/ 

Mindfulness for children. (n.d.). Well Guides – The New York Times. https://www.nytimes.com/guides/well/mindfulness-for-children 

Nicolson, S. (2019). Identifying and supporting children through life changes. He Kupu, 6(1), 11–14. https://www.hekupu.ac.nz/sites/default/files/2019-05/03%20Nicolson.pdf 

Osborn, R. (2020). Difference between adjustment disorder and anxiety | Difference between. http://www.differencebetween.net/science/health/difference-between-adjustment-disorder-and-anxiety/ 

Osborn, R. (2020). Difference between adjustment disorder and MDD | Difference between. http://www.differencebetween.net/science/difference-between-adjustment-disorder-and-mdd/

University of Wisconsin-Madison. (n.d.). Helping children deal with change. https://fyi.extension.wisc.edu/wiomk/files/2012/10/KidsAndChange.pdf